You say more than you think when you’re marketing your small business. You may try to appear confident, but your small self-touch gestures give away your inner anxiety. Or perhaps the shoulder pats meant to build intimacy actually come off as overly aggressive.

I don’t mention it to make you feel uncomfortable. (Most small business owners already feel uncomfortable about marketing without obsessing over every gesture.) Understanding body language can actually empower you to deepen relationships, project confidence, and yes – even make more sales.

I learned this from Janine Driver’s newest bestseller, You Say More Than You Think: Use the New Body Language to Get What You Want. The book shows how to use body language as a springboard into better relationships and a better reputation.

To start reading other people’s body language, Janine recommends first establishing baseline behavior. What gestures come naturally to that person? What postures does she tend to favor? This will help you tell what’s normal.

When that person exhibits a gesture, posture or expression that’s different from her norm, use that as a probing point to ask questions and gain a deeper understanding of her behavior. (After all, reading body language isn’t about reading minds.)

You can also build rapport by angling your belly button toward the other person, mirroring their body language and using small touches occasionally to emphasize points.

One of my favorite parts of the book is the chapter on power gestures, such as the steeple. (Watch the video above for a demonstration.) These can help you exude confidence and authority in situations like sales meetings and networking events. I plan to use these gestures to underscore important points during my next speaking gigs.

How mindful are you of your own body language? What would like to improve? Leave your thoughts in the comments section below.

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